This happens in the brain when we fall out of love
When we fall in love, it triggers a series of reactions in the body but also in the brain. Various hormones and neurotransmitters are involved, and together they form a veritable cocktail in the brain that makes love beat most emotions. But do you know what happens when we fall out of love?
Hug your friends more. Then their feel-good hormones get joy, and you have made another person happier. It may sound a little silly, but even a pat on the shoulder or some other light physical touch means more to our well-being than you might think. The happiness hormone oxytocin is secreted upon contact, and they control a number of vital functions. Oxytocin is a hormone and a neurotransmitter that is triggered in the body by a gentle and friendly touch. An adult who does not get physical touch will survive, but will hardly live. If we are not touched, the body cannot store nutrition or completely cure diseases and injuries. And for children, touch is vital. Older studies in orphanages showed that children can die if they do not receive physical touch.
Whether we are aware of it or not, a lot happens in our brains when we fall in love. For example, the production of adrenaline is stimulated, which causes the heart to beat a little faster, and the palms become moist from sweat. The release of dopamine contributes to feelings of euphoria and excitement.
The oxytocin brings us closer
But it is not only the brain, but also the body is affected when we fall in love.
Everything peeing and hugging, sex leads to an increase in oxytocin – the famous stomach-good hormone. This, in turn, causes us to feel closeness and trust and to connect with the object of our emotions.
An initial decrease in serotonin levels can lead to obsession, anxiety and induces the famous butterflies in the stomach. This eventually settles, and we will instead feel good in the company of the one we love.
The brain stops seeing the partner as a source of joy
But just as when we fall in love, things happen in the brain as we stop being loved. However, nothing goes on overnight, it is done through a complicated process where, among other things, we change our behaviour – which affects the signals in the brain.
When we no longer enjoy and feel good about staying in our partner’s company, the brain’s reward centre ceases to be stimulated by social interaction, which causes the ways in the brain to change and we end up seeing the partner as something that brings happiness.
We are getting annoyed
Pink glasses are disappearing, and we are starting to notice mistakes with our partner, it is also now that we are becoming more easily irritated by small peculiarities that we may have previously perceived as cute.
Once we discover that we are no longer in love with our partner, it is the result of a lengthy process that we probably did not notice until a relatively late stage.
It is not something we go around thinking about until we finally react to something. It’s mainly about sexual attraction. It’s rarely something that becomes particularly long-lasting.
Love changes over time
But it is also important to be aware that love changes to its character over time. For example, the stress hormones that eventually burn the initial passion settle on you and make you lose your breath and instead, we feel calm and comfortable in each others company. Our relationship instead gives us a sense of security that helps us withstand the stresses and demands of the world.
Love seems to be far more complex than meeting someone and falling in love, and then fall out of love. There is a whole science behind why our feelings for our partner are beginning to fade.